I turned 31 two weeks ago. I feel like I should be forever 26 but such is not the case and I really enjoy who I am and what I'm becoming. I don't ever want to shy away from how old I am because that is a part of who I am. Each year I confront new experiences and think of old experiences in a new way. I enjoy this process.
I'm not a huge birthday party fan for myself. Like, please don't throw me a surprise party and if I have a party I'd love to share the lime light with someone else with a Birthday nearby.
When I was sixteen one of my high school friends, with the help of my mom, threw a surprise party for me at the T Bird dinner. The memory always makes me laugh. A while back I did a post about crying and Paula Abdul and the crying part comes into play in this story. The surprise was not so much of a surprise in the end and I think that's how most "surprise parties" go. So, while we were having our party, all seated at the table probably ordering food and talking party talk, there's this DJ man with crazy long legs, short shorts and blond curly mullet-ish hair doing his DJ thang. When he saw that it was my Birthday he tried to get me to come up and dance with him to YMCA. I was laughing but horribly embarrassed (also because he would come up and dance behind me as well). Anyway, while I was experiencing all of these emotions and laughing nervously I also started to cry. The crying wasn't very obvious but laughing and crying often go hand and hand with me. Luckily, my friend, who never minded the lampshade on her head, got up and danced with him saving me from further freak out. All eyes were on me as I outwardly dealt with these seemingly opposing emotions. We did have a good time but I think this story illustrates my early realization that I shy away from attention like that and that if I'm going to laugh really hard a cry might be on its way too. I'm so transparent.
But, I love Love LOVE doing parties for others . . . and I had a great Birthday. AND (here's the clincher), I even had a piccola party with family and some friends. . . and I survived the attention. . . it was great. Can you believe it? I think I'm growing up at 31.